oh another day

TITANIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im watching titanic...titanic....is awesome.....ok........sikit nangis....sikit la hehe....

I LIKE THIS NEW TEMPLATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but....it has no comments in its html T______T ngapa kian....well it doesnt matter anyways =D i wudve had FUN today if not for this selfish retard that ruined everything...dude...if u wanna go poop, u don't have to drag us all in the goddamn bathroom.....figuratively......ARGH!!!!! NDA DAPAT TGK WAYANG!!!!!! aku mau kuar sbb xmau tension....sama ja tension dia...bangsat...however, regardless, kuar with my cousins are always fun xD a bunch of people who just wanna laugh the whole day without a care in the world ^________________^

ok now, the lesson i learned today, is to not let people take the best of u....HOORAY!!!!!!! yeah...and to not let people fog ur own judgment...everyone is entitled to opinions...lemme keep mine, n u keep urs...win-win situation nobody loses EVERYONE'S HAPPY! =))

haaaaah...im tired of always trying to understand people, be the one who always compromises...y couldn't it be like a give n take thing kan2? its time i have my space, with people who only care about DOTA n MU hehe =D ive done my part, now im just a burden so back with the win-win thingy, im sticking to my own ground, n i promise i wont question or critisize urs..im fair!!! and lovely..ngeeeeeeeeeeee

ok now cinemax is playing this hardcore thriller/horror movie.....MUST WATCH...bbbyyyyeeeeeee!!!!

this'll be quick

HOORAAAAYYY!!!! broadband ku amat2 ok sda muahahahaha...im back to being an internet junkie la ni, fb 24 hours a day, changing my blogger templates, dont forget the whining, and discovering more weird things on youtube HAHA!!

o yaa speaking of weird, last nite, the person i never wud've thought to contact me from kuantan, EVER, actually called me (WARGGH!!) err...the only thing i knew about him was probably the fact dat his mustache grows faster on the left side of his mouth...other than that, ZERO. it was weird....

oooohhhhh and hooray for my boyfriend coz he didn't listen to me when i told him to do his assignment on sunday now he's stuck with 3, and it has to be submitted tomorow! not a single one is done!!! HOORAYYY!!! akakakakaka xD

oh question, how would you react if someone told you that he/she is so popular in sabah?

hahahahahahahahahaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ok2 last one....make up......I NEED A SMUDGIE!!!! ='( i cannot live without smoky eyes.......i feel like an artery vein in my body has been cut & now i'm dying bleeding to death......dats how bad i need a smudge tool......hehehe....

i'll probably make a new post again after dis heheeeeeeeeeee....bye for now

stubborn & spoiled right down to the core (whoopsie~)

MIA! MIA! MIA! MIA! MIA!!!!!!!!!!!! i was mia for quite a long time. so the woes, complaints & whining will be extra long from now on xD to cover up all those lost times of course lol xD before elaborating the numerous events that happened in my life during the time i was gone, i just couldn't get this off my chest for the moment. here goes.

i.......i...i.i.i.i.i.i.i....i......i...i..i...i....do not have all the explainations for my behaviour sometimes. i might have an idea why, at times, but, it still does not fully justify wat i did. my outbursts, meltdowns, & temper can be...well...overwhelming.

i always wanna improve my life, & myself. if i feel that im a moron, i'd change till i dont feel like a moron. if i feel like i live the life of a moron, i'd improve watever the heck it is dats moron-ish in my life till it seems pretty ok to me. make sense? ok. now for the main course.

i come across as someone passive since forever! yes. ok. alright. mbah. buli ba. it gives an impression that anything goes for me. when actually, NO ba. so my life gets pretty bad after all this. i attracted pests. & sent out wrong impressions & wat not. so i dont wanna be like dis anymore. i dont wanna be miserable.

so im stamping my foot on the ground; i must get what i want! when i dont, IT ISNT ACCEPTABLE! i want what i want, if it isnt wat i want then i wont bother! it'll be a big NO all the way!

so yeah with that it works. it actually works & i do get my way & stuff. but....doesnt dis make me a moron? xD

haiihh...i win some but i lose some. in the midst of making things right for me, i became very2 stubborn & spoiled~ whoops~ an...accident u might say xD hehe...he...no dis isnt funny...i feel that my outbursts is the inner me trying to fight for wat i want that ive kinda lost my moral compass for a moment there. cant i get my way without all the stubborness & spoiledness?

cant think! mental block! vocab drought! bye2.

The Expressive Words of She Who Carried Me for 9 Months

Grrr i can only remember these 3 for now....my mom is the best xD

"You've always had something against my nose!"

:: when, im not sure. what i'm sure of is that it was damn cute ^^ she was driving, my lil bro ami & myself bought some expensive almost-expired buns at a bakery we shouldn't have gone to. that aside, she asked for a piece. she made a turn and thus the bun went straight to her nose xD n accused ami for having a grudge against her nose xD


"Kunun..."

:: finally, after 10 years, she got the chance to study again. the second opportunity that she never imagined would ever happen. words can't describe this elation, this feeling of supreme achievement, it was happiness at the highest level possible. as she picked up her pen, this was the only thing she managed to say xD


"Let me coil into this blanket."

:: Upon hearing something she unpleasing to her ears. & she did actually coil xD

I dont want to, but have to

Inilah ya, tuan-tuan dan puan-puan, slogan ku untuk bulan ini. I don't want to leave Novotel, but I have to. Sengsara eh. Cukup la dua bulan. Nda ku merati kan berpolitik di opis ani. INGAU KU EH!!!!! Goodbye Novotel, hello kitchen. Im better off baking chocolate cakes xD

Quit Kidding Urself xD

Black Eyed Peas are coming to KL soon kan? Nah, aku letak la gmbar bep sebagai perhiasan~

Did you hear the news about Muslims banned from coming to this concert? xD hahahaha!!! Ok2, im laughing not because we shouldn't do that, it's an effort. We do need to monitor the young ones. but it just seems funny you know? like...........really? What can not watching BEP do to us? Isn't it....a....parents.....job.......to.......mould....their......children.........to be a proper muslim? But yeah....how can they when.......parents......don't....understand....their children? let alone try to?

*diam jap*

erhem. k sambung.

Orait. Maybe, coz the main organizer is Guiness, u know, the booze company. Ok2. So the effort is to instill in the minds of muslim malaysian youth that they aren't supposed to be near Mr Alco. Okla, that will probably work in the long run, we just have to get used to it, & turn it into a commitment. What with the model Kartika's case & stuff, our government seems serious about this. Take note. SEEMS serious.

Now read this.

http://malaysia.news.yahoo.com/afp/20090901/ten-entertainment-malaysia-religion-isla-1dc2b55.html

*ROLLS EYE*

pehhh. so much for trying to set a good example. bawah meja ka ni?

If they aren't serious, how could we? Maybe, they just AREN'T.

Not...what I bargained for

Please read the awesome list below. Thank you.




Hannah is,

1. vocal. i talk.
2. a thinker. i may know what's right & wrong.
3. not a moron. I can tell if ur using me as ur scapegoat, doormat, & etc.
4. a pemanas. saya pun pandai marah balik kalau ko marah.
5. alert. don't play childish games with me.
6. a person who can hold a grudge against someone.
7. not sympathetic towards the pathetic.
8. not one to kiss any asses.
9. patient, but not to idiots.
10. actually a nice person (^_^)V *peace*

Mau cari tempat kerja yg lain. I've been saying this a lot sudah. Damn. DAMN!

ps: how nice if i could just put that bitch's name right here in my blog!! really...i didn't hold my studies to be just THIS & being treated like a stupid child.

nda mau dgr ckap org suda

need to re-arrange my trust cabinet. nda semua org buli ada sna tu. *paranoid* itu ja. sebenarnya. i dont feel like sprinkling fancy words today. i do not trust everyone around me.

Skype!

fb xbleh log in





fs pun




blogging bleh, but its...basically talking to urself T_T




YM HANGKANG!!!!!!






skype me plz people :D (kesian kan?)








*muka 5sen*







my skype name: hunnah.wunnah







uwa. bor. ing.

Working Girl

nah ive never seen the movie xD lol

its been a month, me here in novotel. i spent on booze (not mine), charles & keith's fucshia shoes & cobalt snakeskin handbag (mum & sis), quicksilver uber cool skater button-up shirt (wish it was mine) & two packs of keropok lekor from a shop at university apartments (my requests...YES!). Boy, this part, I like =)

Wanna know what I had to do to get that reward?

5 people were resigning the first week of my job, making me as disoriented & cluttered as if I was Olympic Games winner Wang Hao's ping pong ball. Oh yes. Im not playing here. It feels as though I was teleporting. Mentally & physically. My brain's favorite question was, "What the heck am I supposed to do here?" then poof! Teleport. To an unknown world to men & woman alike where creatures of many sizes & shapes coexist together & they all have one thing in common; they are short-tempered & intolerent in nature & favor those who can read minds. *gasp!*

For a week, it went ok. I learned how to be a psychic & when to turn off the switch in my head. But when I was just starting to get the hang of my job, my brain's favorite word was, "Biarlah". Which led to one messy working table, a lot of high volumed phone calls, & one angry boss. Whew. Not a good time people. Oh yes. Let's not forget it also causes awkward-feeling collegues. They were afraid that I might turn psychotic. & cause a massacre or something xD

Wanna know more? A new person came. A manager. & managers need their coordinators. COORDINATORS! An executive would be nice. But alas, there is only one coordinator in this department. Yup, lil ol me. Or should I say big fat me, doesnt make a difference. It'll still be me. Alone. & this is my first job. I have 3 managers. THREE. Not that I'm complaining. BUT THREE PEOPLE! THREE! Marila kamu kerja cni T_T Did I mention I always go home 2 hours after my working hours are done? Yeah. That's the earliest I can go. & its only during my half day do I actually go back home on time as my regular working days. *what?!*

So let's not talk about the less (or should I say none at all) time I had with my loved ones ='(

For the next thing I'm going to say, it won't be much, & it requires you to read between the lines. People are different from one another, some might be nice, some wont. Some have an excellent personallity, some are just plain IDIOTS. Sekian. (The word starts with an "F", & rhymes with light) Oh, I started it xD

So that's just it. The rest, you know the deal. Alaa...office stuff. Bowringgggggggggg. I don't need to tell you how awesome I am with a computer (ha...ha....ha.....) or with answering calls (he....he....he.....) or wearing black stilletto pumps (ho...ho...ho....) Erm. I just realized that I have denounce myself X___X

Aaaaaanyways. I'm done writing. This is a matter of life & death, I hate to stop LOL hahahaha! Back to work then ^^









I grew WARTS. On my fingers & hands. (added 5.33pm) & R still hasnt contacted me ='((

the microwave is a good guy after all..go green team!

=D

http://green.yahoo.com/blog/daily_green_news/102/seven-surprising-facts-and-myths-about-microwave-ovens.html

back to back

NUMB.

is it ok to say dat im actually embarassed to talk about my new work?

=P

im holding back...coz...dats...wat i do

=PP

but dont get any ideas now!

im doing a legal job & everything its just dat OH NVM!! *sulks at own ridiculousness*

i should be the happiest person in the world now

my lil sis naha is home

making the family complete!

my best friend amy has also finished her practical

& is here!

HOORAY!

puasa is coming, i cant wait

time for the cleansing of the mind, body & soul..

the month couldn't have come in a better time

i really needed it

but i'm not happy

i am CONTENT.

dat's good enough right?

plus,

i have me a pair of shoulders to lean on

even though they might not be there all the time

once in a while is better than none at all =)

♥R♥

ps: this was just an update. im not apologizing for boring u HAHA!

hush

I'm still choked up for Micheal Jackson. I can't bring myself to watch his memorial till now. Maybe to others his passing is old news, but not for me. That guy was the reason I have DREAMS.

Yasmin Ahmad was one of the bravest, fearless & most open-minded person in the film industry here. There could never be anyone like her again; at least not for another 100 years when WE would actually ACCEPT the REAL idea of UNITY. I'm on the Hang Jebat's team.

Al-Fatihah.

what if the word "burit" was an everyday, normal word like "saya"?

• Hai. Nama burit, Siti Raihannah. Apa khabar? Burit khabar baik.
• Mana kau? Burit disini sudah ah. Jumpa burit di ground floor sana.
• Gatal ba burit ni. Hahahahahahaa!
• Burit burit besar sudah ni. neeehhh mana satu penggunaan saya untuk burit?!
• Burit sayang sama sayang. err....ew.

ooh ovari...

mengapakah anda mengeluarkan ovum pada waktu sekarang? dikala masa-masa yang genting lagi parak? adakah kamu dambakan perhatian kerana ovari yang kedua iaitu ovari sebelah kanan telah lama meninggalkanmu? aku......hanya mampu....makan menstrual pain panadol yg berwarna pink untuk menenangkan hatimu yang pilu itu..............................................................















peace.

ui si hannah kerja sudah!!!!!

kamu ada dengar ka tu???

tambirang sudah dia ooooohhhh.....

kunun bekemeja la dia sekarang HHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!!

pndai bz sudah dia skrg kimmmaaaaakkkk
















T__________________________________________________T



























lalalalaaaaa.....

ih..ba apa mau ckap ni?

halu. aku kena suruh update blog.





*crickets*





*sighs*





*scratches head*





*thinks......*





*blogging mode: activated*




it's been a while since i've blog, so pardon the awkward & dull words =P (terus ckp english ba kunu...KIMAK!) i make transitions in my internet-bug activities. Rotating's what u call it HAHA! lol ;P from fs, to fb, to blogspot, to onemanga (yes im serious) to youtube to google & right down to just checking my mails..ini la ba hidup penganggur, not much going on, even if i haven't blogged anything for quite some time but when i do, it'll still be the same thing.....actually~ :D

hmmmmm but speaking about pengangguran si hannah ini, i've kinda made up my mind to studying in UMS...HOORAHH!!! im given time till next year, & if i just laze around not doing anything productive, my mom'll literally throw me to UMS...ok la ba kan?

Oh! I am grounded. Yes. Kinda happily grounded i might say. I went out for a straight 2 weeks with my best friends who were in town for a short time; i reaaaaaallllyyyy CAN'T say no to spending time with them & coming home at 3-4 am in the morn :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D so no regrets HAHAHAHAHAHHAA!!!! IM GROUNDED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YIPEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!

erhem. on a more serious note, 2 others have fallen victim to my ultimate birthday annihilation. I AM PROUD OF MYSELF. pictures will be up ^^ oh tepung, how i love u so! *tears*

oh yeah! yesterday was my baby brother's birthday ^^ but alas, the dude is still to fragile to be tormented of being fooled & tortured to bits for the sake of his birthday. tggu ko habis SPM wahai adik kesayanganku. I had a really good time with him & the rest of my family just now =) if only the other baby (naha) was there, COMPLETE SDA! missing her la ^^

Next saturday will be a picnic with chocolate cakes. coz someone important is coming ^_________^ AMESZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i hope to see EVERYONE soon, after my grounding's done ;P they're busybees ^^ unlike Madam Lazy right here ;P i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait i can't wait TO SEE MY BESTFRIEND AMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I MISS HER SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hehe. k im done now. deactivating the mode shit thingy =P





























ahh...one more thing. hunnah loves ridhwan ^^ SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! next post :P

this familiar dead-end feeling is kinda soothing~~~~~~

nothing compares to home ^^ yup, dat getaway gave me what i needed...& opened my eyes to something i should've seen sooner, but oh well...now i know better right? u don't expect a loved one stepping on u...but sometimes they do~

one thing's sure got me excited..i'm no longer tangled in a state of confusion by a big baby...tho the word DARLING will haunt me forever. damn. BUT!!!! IT'S ALL OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

so im reunited with my true love (the internet) and back with my best friend (the refridgerator) and reconciled with my nemesis (the laundry) hehe...it's back to day dreaming and chasing cars...cloud nine...blurry.. ;)

tho one thing bothered me, i didnt accomplish one thing while on my holiday...

MR ENKI

u. me. kuantan. next time. be there.

*back to blurry mode*

hmmmmm...lemme enjoy this for a while.....hehe......i'll pour the rest of my words next time...oh HOOMMMEEEEYYY!!!!!

<-------- im a shy one... *nosebleed*

in life u have to be adventurous, sometimes u have to put a pervert in ur blog. yes. let's change the world.






I AM SICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i nearly coughed up some really massive phlegm to the dear old tan sri who was handing out the scroll at my convo just now...to really hide that fugly coughing face from being caught in picture & that picture will be hung on my wall for the rest of my life, i did this :DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

hehehehhehehehhehehehehehehehehehheehhehehehehehhehehheheeheheheh

it was all good, i did not puke or coughed while on staged as i feard, & that smile was a saver =D even the tan sri seemed happy that i was smiling like a retard...if he knew the reason behind it, he would probably be so thankful, coz if not he'd be puking his dinner tonight. whew. parak oh sore throat. kimarks.

now that im with family again, my head's back to normal. im so close to feeling normal. yayy. wait till i get home. my VIPs, u noe hu u r, jgn malu2, to all the slim shady, plz stand up...plz stand up....plz stand up....hehe...lawak babi demam campak ka apa ni kimaaaaak....

CANT WAIT TO GO HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im done holidaying...hooraaahh hoorraaaahh hoorrraaahhh hoorrraaaahhhh~~~~~~~~~~~~

the great escape =P

As a drifting waste sailing on the river banks,
I follow what may,
Destination nor desire,
I have none
Purpose,
Life,
What keeps me going,
Is only my on-going breath
My heart
Till it stops.

i need to get outta here for a while before i lose my mind. 22nd may. OH YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AIYOOO!!! ahahahahahaha..hahahaa..ha..ha..ha...?? apaini????

i have an ass cramp for the first time in my life.

oh the agony T_T

my tushie keeps "expanding" more & more due to excessive tribal bellydancing! so i stopped, then for not more than 1 week, i have been punished T_T OW~....i guess there's no turning back now *sobs*

baah bah baaahhh ya la ya la ya laaaaaa *tears while belly-flopping*

freedom. in a cage.

gahh. im lost. confused. don't know what to do. don't know where i'm heading. & i don't really have the right people to guide me here. hellooooooooooo...mak ai.

i need to be given advices at times, not the one to give them all the time. i need the one to be listened to, not the one that has to listen. WAIT! i am not seeking for attention nor am i one selfish bitch, i'm just asking for some slack. you know. lemme breath for a while. whoo.

i wanna be able to ask a question and people to answer me truthfully. not based on their own importance. such as, should i go to danum? yes, coz ur mopping 'round the house, u look miserable. instead of, no *miserable face* adeh.

if i'm not allowed to do what i want, then when will i be able to? aren't my despair *sorry, feeling a lil vocabularic" a thing to pay attention to before they turn to regrets & i'll never forgive you for that...like, EVER? justice...I NEED JUSTICE!!!!!!!!

i've changed. I'VE CHANGED. i've always been a person who doesn't like to be tied down, like waaaaaaaay down, that i can literally taste the grass, and right now, that has evolved i guess. i do NOT want to belong to anybody. repeat, ANYBODY. i am sooooooo a husband to a certain person right now. gila eh.

i have things that i want. & to be understood of the things that i want. im running out of time here. there's things that i wanna achieve. things i wanna do. things i dream of. lemme emphasize, dream. just cause you were robbed of yours, doesn't mean that it has to be the same for me =(

so i'm just gonna sit here & watch people surpass me? jeez. okay, hannah the fat, silly, funny, laughs at herself a lot, does have pride & ego ok. HUGE ones. some just don't realize. even worse, *waaarrghh* i do not wanna say the "c" word.

so, how long am i gonna stay here? i have to say that this is not a bad place; sheltered, protected, secured, carefree....blah blah blah. wanna know what happens if i try to get out? i get FED. i was fed so much till i can't move. seriously. if u think a little bit deeper, i think you'd know what i mean, its "bribery". or however you see it. i just...*sigh* aduuuuuuuyay.

you can't be happy when these thoughts still come to your mind. you can't be at peace when you haven't felt that self-satisfaction yet. my desires, my passion....bila? when? you CAN'T feel freedom in cage. that's BULLSHIT.

I speak in cryptic words :D :D :D :D :D :D

I tend to express the opposite of what I actually feel by justifying it with something artificial & forced. So as to compensate & overtake the emotion that I was actually feeling. Only occasionally that I really say what I wanna say.

I know, been listening to My Chemical Romance.






>______________________<

is happiness a choice?

WAARRRGGHHH!!! KENAPA?????? kenapa....KENAPA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

card reader ku...entah kemana...how am i gonna show off my pictures? not that they're that good anyways...but just..just..just...just...how am i gonna show off to the world of my happy little life filled with perfectness & joy & contentment & peace & happiness & smiley faces & laughter & ...

wokay. baik nda pa la kan. bagus la tu kan aku nda dapat upload picts.

ngarut mu hannah.

bye.

L.O.V.E.

It's better to feel many types of sadness then coming to a home that's EMPTY. =) My family ROOOCCCCCKKKKKSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/

who am i kidding =)

bah. hannah. if u can't & won't let urself pour out anything, then dammit stop wasting ur damn time!!!

pardon my mood swings yah. besala. xena the warrior princess. @_@

i'm not supposed to be awake right now, i have to wake up early to go jogging with my sayang2Ku at taman likas tomorow. ahh well, i'll still wake up early tomorow nonetheless, so it matters not :D

*kenapa...ayat ku...begini?*

at times, i do act HUMAN & feel that i am unable to suppress or pretend nothing is happening to me internally. there i was trying to write another ludicrous post about my silly self & trying to cheer myself up while joking & saying stuff dat'll make people laugh. hahh. like i said, who am i kidding?

aaaaaiiiiii..fil laik ai don hev tu opolojais for biying imo. it is my blog aint it.

*another symptom of mine...Paranoid*

im sure people sometimes feel like they half wanted to say something, & also not wanting to let people in & know what's bothering them, & thus they end up complaining about.......absolutely NOTHING at all. =D sorry baaaaaaaaaaah. gini la ba kerja aku kalau blogging. nda paedah2 miahahahaha.

so i can't make a funny post bout my imperfections for now & laughing hard at it & feeling relieved & believing that i am contempt. FOR NOW tho. =D =D =D =D =D

i need to just accept this for the moment & not let anything spoil it. i think im gonna have a good sleep tonight & dream about the beautiful day i had today ^________________^

*sounds a tad too sickly & sweet for a moment there @_@*

yippee

WAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!







i can't stand this. i am so not comprehended right now, i'm like a foreign language to some people. im confusing. im baffling.











WEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!











im losing my mind here. urgh.













ok i whine. BITE ME.

probably drank too much coffee

=D




padan muka. neeeeehhh.






tehee~ i dont know what to do with myself~ JENG JENG!!! dunnooo what to doooo with myseeeelf jeng jeng!! aaaAAAaaaaAAAA.....

hear me ROAR

my head was touched by a 210 Celsius steel. HOT. so horizontally, i have burns on my head that looks like a bunch of booger stickers stacking on the left side of my nagen. pretty? i think NOT. so i went to a store yesterday, somewhere near my place, and opposite the stationary & printing shop, 5 blocks away from the pasar inanam, a few steps ahead from the lady that sells corn in cup (oh yummy), just around the corner of fei fei workshop, beside the store that i actually went, is a restaurant with an open bathroom. open = platforms of wood, place them in a cubic kind of shape, tada! a toilet. it doesn't even need a door. ew. it was just inches from the tables...that...u....actually.....eat....on. wow.

i......am an artist. i love art. everything i do is about art. art is me, & i am art. art is in my veins. art art art art. ART! from fARTing to watching bART simpsons, i savy art. i think, this particular word, is being vandalized. who wants to send me to jail?

KUIH SAPIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i wanna go to papar & buy me some original kuih sapit. & kuih kelapa. oh nyaman. tolong la. TOLONG LA!

*these few lines have been deleted by me for bowling reasons. i am not a grasshopper*

so, this dude says, "i'm going to asia!!! YEAAAAAHHH!!!!!" this other dude says, "cool! get me aishwarya rai's autograph or something will ya?" and then he replies, "what? you stupid? that's in India." so the other dude says, "yeah, ur going to asia right? that's why i..." the other dude butts in, "no man, i'm going to ASIA. i wanna watch kung fu pow pow POW!" thus, the dude can only say, ".................................................................." hahh. aint we lucky?

oh dear. i feel so scatterbrained right now, i actually feel like a roadkill. u know, when them chickens & what not running amock when cars are here and there. then *SCCRRRAAAAAAAAPPPEEEEEE* hah. yah.

pardon me. i dont like being angry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! bida ni ba rasa dia. emo2. ish. yuck. ptui. i spit at you.

i'll.....shut up now.

sweet & simple

1. cousin's house
   
2. interview went ok
   
3. forgot wallet, left penniless
4. last person on mind to show up & picked me up
5. the irony
6. home
   
7. slept
8. dreamed
9. woke up
10. thoughts
11. ......
12. ........
13. ........
14. ......
15. .......
16. ........
17. .......
18. ...........................................................
19. f*ck. i've been used.

thank u.

































kenapa bah. muka aku kena cop apa oh?

great.....now i have to choose between two again

Both are decent choices. Either two of them are fine; one's far away, one's right here in kk. One's ready to accept me, one's still undetermined. This one is in kk. The "judgement" day is tomorow. I don't even know what to say yet @_@

I want both of them! Of course, not only is it impossible, it's ridiculous :P Nothing good comes from being greedy. Don't forget that hannah.

It's still doesn't change the fact though, that I have to somehow let go of one. It's gonna take a toll on my conscience. I can feel it T_T I'll be feeling all guilty & whiny & complain-ny & everything-y. Argh. I hate choosing! =(

I want the one in kk but what if I'm not wanted? If I take the one that's far away, the DISTANCE man...I'm not kidding. FAR.

I guess I have to make a wise choice. That seems somewhat unlikely of the infamous hannah the childish nerd. But I have to try because I might end up losing both. Which is much worse. I need a little guidance & probably more advices from my VIPs. People, I need you T_T

Oh yeah, I'm talking bout job offers here by the way. Forgot to mention that. Tomorow's the interview with Imperial Hotel (kk). Whoopsie~

Pucker Up!

MWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!

As normal human beings, we all have insecurities. Imperfections in every one of us indicates that we are mere God's creation, nothing more. To live, we can all try to overcome our insecurities; be it going for soul-healing sessions or to alter our imperfections. And make them beautiful in our own eyes. *sigh* These ladies, unfortunately, made themselves looking 10 times worst than what they already were. Astagaaaaaaa. Serious. Keep scrolling.



Silicon lips. Who's to blame? Yes, us women have every right to make ourselves pleasing in the eyes; but I think there is a limit to where these beautifying procedures can be too much. Right? A sky-rocketing profit for the surgeons or obsessions with beauty...which actually made this silicon lips era? @_@ Maybelline's lip gloss & Bed Head's lipsticks are fine!


Why would they want thick big lips anyways?? It baffles me. If I was given a free & paid for silicon lips surgery, I'd prefer Maggi =D AYAM FLAVOUR!!!! nyum nyum...uh oh. now I'm craving.


OHHH NOOOOO COURTNEY LOVE!!!!! T_T She was fine without the fake lips, she already had that pouty & full lips...


Okay. Surgery was supposed to make someone look better; like the iconic Norma Jean@Marilyn Monroe did. It did wonders for her & so many others. Botox, I can cope, but this is just seriously the oddest trend ever. Waaaarrrgghhhh!!!! This isn't flattering at all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Didn't anybody tell them that???? Ok ok...who am I to question when they wanna go under the knife right, it's their choice. But but but but this is.....attractive in a different way. It sure attracts attention in definitely the WRONG way.


This..............................................is disturbing @_@



Dude, you look like a DUDE. I am so glad that this insane trend isn't conquering where I live. It would be weird looking at people around me that has these kinda lips. Let alone people I know TT________TT NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! *nightmare*


I'M OUT OF WORDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Appreciating & accepting yourself is very important isn't it?

i like to explain every single thing bit by bit especially if it has something to do with my blog, from its name to my post's date's font's color

i made changes. =D gee, that was so not obvious wasn't it?

raaawwwwkkk....!!!!

dude, do not shake the bottle. seriously.

being nice really just gives u issues huh? woookay.

u know how my post usually starts with stuff like,

"Im feeling kind of............"

"It's just so sad................"

"Im so angry that............."

"Im stressed out......."

"Syam is so hot........"

oops.



that last sentence.....probably was the first time i write it here =D

couldn't resist LMAO!!




nakal! :P *distracted for a good 10 minutes*







ERHEM.


i think i've mentioned it before too, when trying to not be a pain in someone's ass, it brings pain into ur own ass. T_T aye, sad but true. that seems to be like a theme for my life. im cursed. for a whole lifetime.

i have like a trivial & complicated issue with a certain someone whom i do not wanna mention. i wanna forget the whole thing, we're supposed to be close, heck, we're flesh & blood. but, that person dissapointed & hurt me so badly, i couldn't even talk it out with him/her. *i wanna keep this person anonymous.*

i've wrote about this person before in my previous posts. and i kept how i felt & my thoughts to myself as it feels disgusting even on my tounge to talk about it. I REALLY CAN'T! that indifferent face & nonchalant behaviour really from him/her puts me down. that person knew what he/she had done to me but it seems like he/she doesn't care.

seeing as how talking won't get anywhere anyways, i tried to swallow everything & forget about it. but when something so strong is bottled up in u, it is bound to leak its way out of ur heart. i am human nonetheless. i do have feelings.

so, that person went & did some things that really2 pisses me off & those kept emotions of mine arised. if it hasn't anything to do with what happened in the past, its okay. the thing is, it HAS something to do with it. undoubtedly, i guess that person really does not understand what im going thru. =(

penat. really penat with this. im tired of compromising. with me refusing to not come clean with u, im doing u one BIG FAT FAVOUR. im sparing u the guilt that u should've felt due to ur own actions. im burdening my own self carrying this heavy bottle containing of ur wrong doings to me, so shouldn't it be like a silent mutual thing? u r the MATURE ONE.

so dude...................do not shake the bottle. seriously.

=P

*otak memberontak. dia enggan tidur*

astaga!!!! i have an exam tomorow!!!!! @.@

& here i am, in front of my laptop :D

tomorrow's the takaful exam, &....well....erm....i've only memorized the table of content T_T

after meeting up with my bestie amesz, i promised myself that i would definitely read the book.

but.....

QUENTIN TARENTINO'S BACK-TO-BACK MOVIES ARE PLAYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
how can i resist maaaaan....i love his movies @.@

uhuh im so bad ;P

erhem!

i feel like this week has been quite a rollercoaster ride...most of it going down..my mind's just blank most of the time~ like im experiencing burnout coz of staying at home too much T_T guess that's explains me no being able to study? :D *alasan*

but reaaaaallyyyy!!! i don't even have anything interesting to write, tp...mau blog juga >(

oh yeah, i just have this teeny explaination to make! if ur hearing black-metalish or darth vader's voice when opening my blog, i am not spreading evil nor is Mr Darth Vader trying to communicate to u..it's...my songlist T______T in case ur curious, Tala Tala Tala Tala consist of:

~Dope Crunk by Beats Antique~

~Elastic Eye by The Chemical Brothers~

~Shake Break Bounce by The Chemical Brothers~

~Slow Spines by Chris Clark (this could be the one sounding like Darth Vader)~

~Digital Monkey by Balkan Beat Box~

~Snakecharmer by Bassnectar~



^___________________________________________^



I HEART THESE SONGS!

wallflower, out! =)

Takziah

To my Aunt, my dad's first cousin, whom unfortunately I did not spend much time with, who passed away on the 7th of April. You are dearly missed, & you won't be forgotten. Al-fatihah.













Unsaid words, what you wish could have done, the true intentions in the deepest depth of your heart.....i wish.............how i wish.........

Don't need distractions at the moment!

ahh. here i go again. focused one second, forgets everything the next. NO! i will not think about what people will think but to do whatever i want & whatever makes me happy. i gotta constantly remind myself this little fact here every single day. & my so-called renewed resolution, I'M WORKING ON THAT! so i can't loose myself, gotta be focused before i get in too deep. eerrrmm a lil note btw, this is probably something that only i can understand...right? eheh. ooops. erm. i don't intend to elaborate much anyways. i need my bestie amesz. amyyyy... *muka sepusin*

it's just that, i hate it when I'm not the one in control of myself. but its these.......misleading things that are taking the best of me. tidak mahu.

between yes, no, & maybe, i have an absolute answer now. its NO. i don't mind watching the sunset on my own. hehe merry happy, kate nash!

&, i don't need to think about pleasing anyone now either. other than my VIPs :D :D :D :D u know who u r =)

i actually feel a little better, despite a vague & unclear post :P

a lesson for all teachers >:D

jan jahat sama budak2. dgr cakap drg (^^)




matai ko. miahahahahahahahha

Flight of the Conchords - JENNY

ahahahahahahahahhaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahhaahhaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hari yang paling random

good evening :D

ini post ni semua pasal saya. brace urself, its LONG ahahahha...haa...ahahh *ketawa angin*

i don't know how my interview went!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the anxiety still hits me even when everything was over...hmm i dunno if that was like a real interview or anything, they still have to refer to this one dude..well, at least, i smelled good & i put on my best bila-jumpa-mama-mentua smile. up to them la suda tu kan? :D :D :D

ok, this might sound psychologically off, but when im alone & taking the bus or walking, my train of thought is so intense i feel like my brain & me are two different entities. do i....need a shrink? haha! from the days of my diploma, when traveling to get my ass to the airport, excursions, on a bus from ktn to kl & back, on the plane itself, dammit, I FRIGGIN' THINK A LOT!!!!!!!!! at times it can be soothing, at times the skeletons in my closet comes out on its own. they would mock me >.<>

first mishap of the day, lambat bangun. ^______^ eheh. fuuh. nsb baik miss irene pun busy time pagi. whew~ then i walked out of my room, my lil bro was eating maggi, & could still hear my big bro's snores. oh lookie, my mom is still here too. okay. @_@ both of my brothers ponteng school!!! kaliff nda pigi kelas! @_____@ & mama nda pegi office..she's just gonna go to teach =D hahh..cumilnya family ku ^____^

k, my mom sent me to my dad's office. the company was just in front of his anyways, so dgn selambanya masuk p office dia & said

"haaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiii papaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"

nden, he said,

"bukan the tourism division tu d sadong jaya ka?"

erm. wait. inoprise is....d depan office papa la kan? i was in likas. sadong jaya = kk

TTT__________________________TTT

"eheh...buli papa...hantar hannah p kk? :D" ngahahahhah

"ya ya papa hantar, cepat" :P lalalalaaa...

& so i got there, did the interview, & went to get the best roti sardine in the whole world!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D :D :D :D :D :D :D forgotla nama restaurant tu, but i went there last time & ordered tu roti sardine la, haihh...pnya nyaman...ohh & i saw my old schoolmate. junior la. mau tegur...but he was so proud of his girlfriend *sigh* & he made a face that stated "im the man" ???????? bah. aku makan la dlu ah. while watching men in their underpants. literally hahaha!! tv 2 was interviewing former Mr. Kuching 1989 & he was eating 10 boiled eggs @_@ muak eh. yeckhh.

it stopped raining, & so i guess i'll walk from sadong to karamunsing's bustop (-_-") i didnt wana wait up on my parents, & it was still early so i decided to go home on my own. its far, but i just didn't wanna wait.

so, my scatterbrained thoughts started, as usual. i just wanna think about everything surrounding me & comment it in my own head. as i was thinking & thinking & thinking some more, i was already near the bustop. hooray! :D i was actually near the wide green vass that i just usually passed inside of a car. it was kinda nice :D it wasn't as far as i thought too!!!

so, all i had to do now was cross the road...so...


"AMOOOOOIIIII!!!! INI ORG KIRIM SALAM BA MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!"


wtf....

*cars honking*

KIMAK!!!!!!!!!! tidak lucu tu T_T aku...hmpir kena langgar sbb kau mau ckp kwn ko kirim slam. meh aku silambam dulu kau.

but my mood quickly changed! i was passing under a jalan tingkat2 *nda tau cmna mau explain* pnya smat @_@ i will bring naha there one day for ammature photography sessions ;P

so i finally got to the bustop. :D whew. no more weird encounters i hope. so i was just daydreaming & thinking while waiting, then a pacik tegur me "nak, mana kau mo pigi ni?" i told him, & he asked where i was from, bangsa apa, jawab ja la. didn't look like a harmful person so i just talked to him. then he said "blah blah pacik aziz blah blah blah" the rest was kinda incomprehendable...so i just nodded la. entah apa dia bilang.

nden, smpai la my bus kan. so i walked to get my butt in there, nden this pacik (aziz, i guess) was suddenly standing up & said "ini bagi dia duduk ini, ko kasi dia duduk saya kenal ini" ? hah? oh...ok, thanks i guess but i could stand. im no whiner. nden the bus conductor talked to him. pointed to me & said "mari cni saudara pacik aziz!" ??????? what? apa? kah? ok. aku. naik. saja. lah. the pacik was talking to the bus driver. what's going on here?

gerak la suda bas tu kan. but i was still confused with what just happened. oh well. so, i took out my tambang, pointing to the bus conductor, giving it to him. & he refused it with a tiny head shake. ?????????????????? aik. kenapa? multiple times, i pointed it to him, but he didnt seem to want it. ???????????????????????? c'moooooooooooooooooooon let me pay like everyone else!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im not priviliged with anything here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

nden, the pacik came into my head. @_@ *gasp* mafia ka pacik td tu? erm. im just gonna put on my iPod.

so, i arrived home. i tried to pay for my ride, but all the bus dude said was "Jalan ja la" TT____________________TT hahh. ok.

it's still a long way till i actually get my butt home. i have to walk about, half a mile? maybe? kinda far but i like the view especially when its rainy. the clouds get all dramatic & smoky. iim gonna kidnap my dad's cam one of these days & take them cloud picts!!!! heheheheheh...best baaa..mau2 lg kalau curi2 naik tangki air dekat guardhouse tu. wahh.

suddenly, my feet feels kinda sore. they hurt!! my ankles was killing me! staga. teda pun aku terseliuh td!! kenapa sakit niiiiiii...duinah mcm2 la ba. then, i looked down to my feet.

yes. of course. the whole point of me being out of the house was to attend an interview.

OF COURSE I HAVE 3 INCH HEELS ON.

(-________________________________________-")

i....wasn't aware of that. i should've just waited for my parents shouldn't I? LMAO

itulah...that was my day...from my eyes, my views, my perspective...where I could reminisce about it one day & laugh, frown maybe, & unable to explain why :D just one of those days that are both senseless & significant at the same time. boy. i talk a lot don't i?

hahh..mcm dpt spek baru

ni baru nyaman mata ku!! nnt2la bebackground yg cumil2...serabut ni ba :D

hooraaahhh tomorow's my interview with inorprise :D :D :D :D :D :D i dont wanna jinx myself so i'll just shut up bout dis untill its all done ;P

wokehh..today, i went out with my lil bro ami!! =) my darling lil bro...here's the thing...usually, lil brothers are clingy to their elder siblings right? and when u go out, they wanna follow too...watever u wanna do, they are just up in your face and wanting to tag along with u.

but wit me & that cute lil bro of mine, its the whole opposite thing MIAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH!!!

im the clingy one (^^,) hehehehehehe seriously~ i pretty much do everything he does from playing the PS 2, reading manga, and occasionally (& i mean, jarang2) watch football..LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!....tho i look like an idiot when i do so he doesn't really recommend that i watch football hehehe

so today, as if i don't embarrass myself enough, being the immature & childish one, i discovered that...he....is....knowledgable than me....

(-_____________________________________________________-")

nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!! hahahahaha

konon la kan....konon....i brought him out to study, he's having PMR this year and it's hard to study at home, i know that, & so i wanted to tutor him a bit, sit down somewhere and stuff..we were reading & answering questions, he did it all without me doing anything T____T he even knew things that weren't in his text book TT_______________TT he corrected me most of the time......

bolehkah aku menangis?

gila lah. bangga la juga :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

but seriously duuuude that made me feel like a bimbo...BIG TIME >.<

oh well hahahahaha...cant help being who i am...dia pun sama :D :D :D :D

thoughts for today: those old wounds never really healed. im aware of that. hmmm najib the new PM eh? are we in good hands people? i have a baaaaaaaad vibe bout dis.......next post!!!

a bad coloured rainbow hahaha

hehahaaaa. i did some changes to my blog but the colours are still......berhamburan hehehehehehe. sakit la jua mata tgk >.<


i didn't plan on writing anything specific (or useful hehee) on this post (as always) sooooooooo...wanna see my new pictures? :DDDDDDD

Before:

After:

(nope that won't do...again!)








FINAL:

wat do ya think??????? ngehh...at times, i do feel like Xena...u know...the warrior princess? i didnt at first but seriously, im hearing the theme song a lot in my head nowadays @_@ but, im really liking this new hair. its kinda like a transformation, which was what i wanted! i was getting tired of my old hair so much. (do i sound self-centered? :P)





3 comments i cannot forget:

1. "U don't look malaysian! or asian! or eroupean! u look...HANNAH!" by my mom. she meant i created a new race. bangsa hannah. i looked so different i created a new race hehehehehe i love my mom ^___^ course, moms always say nice things bout their kids, so im still on earth ;)

2. "Hannaaaaaaaaah u look nice!" by my lil bro. that's the first time he said that =)

3. "My, siapa kawan ko ni? dari hari tu lagi aku nampak" my best friend amy's mom. we've known each other for the past 11 years. that's about the same time i've known her mom too :D :D :D :D :D :D





no 1 & 3 cracks me up to tears ^______________________^ while no 2, gave me tears for a different reason =))


well, that's it for now. i have tons of things to write but i'll save that for another time. my back ache is IMPOSSIBLE!!! i guess i have been sitting here a bit too long....ehehh..

id like to say thank u to those new people who visited my blog! do feel free to leave any comment or say something at the chat box =)

bye bye now!